Thanks for sharing this valuable insight. In my super-limited experience (because vulnerability is eww), I have found that sometimes I have to ask twice for critical feedback. The first time, the reader is afraid to wound, but by asking a second time, they seem to understand that a *little* wounding is okay. I recently shared a poem with my husband where this happened. The second time he said "I'm not sure this word is best here... it communicates ___." And I was like "YES! That's exactly what I was thinking!" It was validating, even though we/I did not come up with a solution for the problem word.
But I have questions: Do you ever get feedback that you completely write off because the reader just doesn't understand your vision? Or do you still try to find something to take away/incorporate? Basically, are there ever times where you trust yourself/your intuition so much that the feedback doesn't feel helpful? 🤔
that's good—persistence in asking for negative feedback is a good tip. esp when you sense that something is off with what you made, but you may have lost sound perspective along the way.
and to your question—I try to not write off someone's feedback, but it is important to categorize it. like if something doesn't resonate with a good friend of mine, but I also know that they don't read/like poetry at all, then I let both of us off the hook. I guess in that, I'm acknowledging that not everything we make is for everyone. for example, I would imagine that the number of people who chiefly listen to heavy metal music who also love my music would be very low (approaching zero), and I'm okay with that... so yes, I don't commit myself to incorporating feedback from everyone, but I do try to think about why it didn't land with them.
I have to be vulnerable? 😩 Eww.
Thanks for sharing this valuable insight. In my super-limited experience (because vulnerability is eww), I have found that sometimes I have to ask twice for critical feedback. The first time, the reader is afraid to wound, but by asking a second time, they seem to understand that a *little* wounding is okay. I recently shared a poem with my husband where this happened. The second time he said "I'm not sure this word is best here... it communicates ___." And I was like "YES! That's exactly what I was thinking!" It was validating, even though we/I did not come up with a solution for the problem word.
But I have questions: Do you ever get feedback that you completely write off because the reader just doesn't understand your vision? Or do you still try to find something to take away/incorporate? Basically, are there ever times where you trust yourself/your intuition so much that the feedback doesn't feel helpful? 🤔
that's good—persistence in asking for negative feedback is a good tip. esp when you sense that something is off with what you made, but you may have lost sound perspective along the way.
and to your question—I try to not write off someone's feedback, but it is important to categorize it. like if something doesn't resonate with a good friend of mine, but I also know that they don't read/like poetry at all, then I let both of us off the hook. I guess in that, I'm acknowledging that not everything we make is for everyone. for example, I would imagine that the number of people who chiefly listen to heavy metal music who also love my music would be very low (approaching zero), and I'm okay with that... so yes, I don't commit myself to incorporating feedback from everyone, but I do try to think about why it didn't land with them.