who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?
I will not pretend to be immune to worry.
having chosen to cut a path through the woods with a machete (my guitar), I’m familiar with the way the night shadows play with the fire of my hope and throw them against the unknown contours of the future. and the darkened woods of my imagination can play tricks on me.
worrying is a sensible thing to do. not only now, when many unknowns are at play, but as a way of life (not that I’m advocating for it).
our exposure to endless concerning news stories1 can make us feel we have a duty to pay attention to the endless suffering of humanity, and the world around us. this response—to pay heed to the suffering of others—is normal and right. we understand the intrinsic dignity of each human life. only, our constant exposure to suffering is seldom offset by attention to the good.
and I will happily let you find your own way here—for me, when I see in myself a growing paralysis, or inaction, rooted in the unceasing flow of fearful headlines, I sometimes need to staunch the flow (ie, take a break).
we humans have the wonderful ability to cast our imaginations into the future, and then to create it through our actions. but sometimes, when worry barrels down like a thunderhead, we can feel that we are mostly being acted upon, and all there is to do is to find shelter.
I would contend that we are not merely subject to our worries—as real as they are.
but what are our weapons of choice as the maelstrom of worry approaches? I’d like to suggest 5 questions that serve me as an antidote to bouts of excessive worry (I’m not a doctor or a therapist, these are just thought-fires that have helped illuminate my own sometimes darkened imagination):
1 — what good can I do with what I have?
you may be rich and have at your hand resources that could be the answer to family, friend, or neighbor. but you’re probably richer than you think. with whatever resources, or skills, relationships, languages, sense of humor, reservoirs of knowledge, degrees, musical talents, etc—what small good can you do with them? treat others the way you want to be treated is a powerful concept if you first consider how you would want to be treated.
2 — what do I have right now to be grateful for?
I don’t think I can oversell gratitude as a practice. here’s a wonderful (longer) quote from Lewis that I think of often:
But the most obvious fact about praise — whether of God or anything — strangely escaped me. I thought of it in terms of compliment, approval, or the giving of honor. I had never noticed that all enjoyment spontaneously overflows into praise. … The world rings with praise — lovers praising their mistresses, readers their favorite poet, walkers praising the countryside, players praising their favorite game. … I think we delight to praise what we enjoy because the praise not merely expresses but completes the enjoyment; it is its appointed consummation. It is not out of compliment that lovers keep on telling one another how beautiful they are; the delight is incomplete till it is expressed. It is frustrating to have discovered a new author and not to be able to tell anyone how good he is; to come suddenly, at the turn of the road, upon some mountain valley of unexpected grandeur and then to have to keep silent because the people with you care for it no more than for a tin can in the ditch; to hear a good joke and find no one to share it with…
3 — to whom can I extend a shelter of peace?
this is a modulation on the first. but I think we discount our relational wealth. who are the people in your life who need to be watered? who need encouragement? I find direction from the proverb which says: he who refreshes others will himself be refreshed. and if you are bone-dry maybe it is time to look for a well. but probably most of us are in a position to be some small intentional light in the lives to which we are connected.
4 — make a list of everything you’re worried about right now2
I have mentioned this before (on a previous post about worry—strange ;). but I find it oddly liberating to make a list of all the things I’m worried about at this very moment. if you’re a thoughtful/sensitive person you might be able to fill a page (maybe the back too). but I find that as I write item after item across the page, I disentangle my own threaded thoughts (it does feel like combing out Joanna’s hair sometimes). and usually I discover that half of what I’m worried about I have little to no power to control.
but some other things clearly stand out—things I know I have been given to take care of, to give my life for.
this condensation of thought through writing, this disentangling, is so refreshing and centering for my thought life.
5 — how might I synthesize this worry?
worry is natural, but it’s harmful in large doses or over a long period of time.
but worry can also be translated, or synthesized into something good. worry can be translated into prayer, or journaling, or reaching out to someone to talk. for me, many times worry gets synthesized into song. worry often poses as a question begging for an answer. sometimes you find, when you wrestle with it, that you already know the answer. or other times it will present as fear, and there is, in that, the invitation to press in and get to the root of that fear.
so many of my songs started in worry and resolved on the 4.
Q: what are your go-tos for moving towards peace of mind? (songs or practices)
^ alt theme songs for this episode?
thanks for being here. I write weekly sharing poetry, songs, musings, thoughts on creative life, and hopefully some encouragement… my first collection of poetry, Snowmelt to Roots, is available in my shop, (or on Amazon). and my music is available here.
tour info is here (with shows coming up in TN, MO, KS & NE).
peace,
Z
and trends, social media, doom scroll, etc.
this is technically not a question—sorry for the misinfo
Feeling all of this.
And now for my "that's not the point" tangent: How beautiful is the concept that "delight is incomplete till it is expressed." 🥰